The Lowe-down: Eight years ago today...

I almost can't believe it!! How can G be EIGHT YEARS OLD???

Didn't we just finish having birthday number "7"?

Wasn't it just a short time ago when he was a new little baby?

The Big Guy Lowe and I were so excited to have our little baby. This is what I was looking like back then.

We had been told by doctors that we wouldn't be able to have children. We had gone through the pain and anguish that keenly tore at our hearts. In the midst of the doctor visits, research, tears and sadness, I was given a blessing. The Big Guy Lowe, as a worthy Priesthood holder, took the opportunity to give a blessing of comfort to his heart-sick wife. In that blessing I was told among other things, that we would be able to have children. While comforted, I needed my dear husband to remind me of this special blessing in the coming months--during my times of weakness and question, while our doctors continued to say things like "premature ovarian failure, test results over time show things aren't right, need to seek specialists, seek to grow your family by other means..." It was hard to remember the feeling I had in my heart when I received that special blessing; when I received the words my Savior wanted me to know. Currently, The Big Guy Lowe and I are reading the Biography of President Thomas S. Monson. Something he has shared that I love is the true principle that Faith and Fear cannot reside at the same time in our hearts. I learned that principle during our time of great struggle. Faith does overcome fear...and it did.

We found a new doctor, a fertility endocrinologist up in SLC. New tests were run, similar results were found, but we pressed forward. It was actually a scary feeling, wanting to look at the pregnancy test I had just taken, but being so afraid of the devestation that I had felt so many times before. I put the test in a drawer and then called for The Big Guy Lowe to come into the bathroom. Oh, I hadn't told him I was going to take another test. When I explained what I had done and that the test was in the drawer but I didn't have the courage to look at it, he opened the drawer and excitedly asked "What do two lines mean?" When we took this good news to our doctor, he was surprised, but instead of asking how decided to persue a healthy pregnancy. Such gratitude filled our hearts. Even now, many years later I am touched with a peace and gratitude for that time in our lives.

The pregnancy progressed well, until the very end. Nothing crazy, but my blood pressure started increasing to the point that my doctor sent us over to the hospital a few weeks early to have our baby. We were nervous and excited. My mom was planning on being with us to help, but we weren't supposed to have our baby until the 18th, and my sister, Emily, was getting married on the 10th. While nervous, I felt like Scott and I would be able to handle things well together. My in-laws offered to come back out (they had been at our house just a week earlier over Thanksgiving), but we let them know we would be okay.

G was born early in the morning on December 5th, 2002. We were so happy, and SO tired!

Wow, did I mention that I was SO tired. Not that pretty, but we had just been working pretty hard for the last 19 hours.

This little sweetie was worth it!

Our next week was a bit of a roller-coaster as I'm sure it is with most first-time parents. Our little G was jaundice, like many newborns, but his bilirubin levels were in the low 20s, which was getting dangerous. We haven't met anyone else that has had this experience as new parents, but our pediatrician ordered the "bed of lights" to be set up at our home instead of having G brought back to the hospital.

We called some friends from the congregation we belonged to in Holladay, and Scott and another priesthood holder gave G his first blessing. Later that evening, when the little light-bed arrived we needed the strength we knew our faith could provide. Oh that bed! This bed is just bigger than our little baby. For the first night home we were required to keep him in the bed with only a diaper--no swaddling and only two eye pads with some netting to keep the eye pads in place (at the risk of causing eye damage if we didn't keep them covered!). The Big Guy Lowe and I cried and cried as we laid him down the first time. We weren't allowed to hold him other than 30 minutes for every three hours. In the 30 minutes out of the bed we needed to feed him, change his diaper and cuddle as much as possible, but then he had to be placed back for another 3 hours. I was truly exhausted, and so was The Big Guy Lowe. We slept in shifts both being awake for our precious 30 minutes. I'm so grateful for the love and support that The Big Guy Lowe and I provide for each other...then and now. I don't know how we would have made it through that seemingly never-ending night, but it was one of those amazing experiences that helped knit our little family together. Oh, did I mention that The Big Guy Lowe had a final the next morning? Yep, he did, and it went very well.

Wow. Amazing what we go through and how the memories of those experiences can bring such strong emotions back so intensely. We made it through that first rough week. My wonderful mother came out as soon as she was able and we were so grateful for her love and caring support...for all of us.

Christmas that year was bitter-sweet. We brought my mom to the airport so she could go back home. It hit me so hard how dearly I wanted to raise our son near family. As any new mother would feel, watching my mom walk into the airport brought huge tears to my eyes that lasted for the majority of that day. I already missed her love, support and gentle reassurement that every new mother needs. I will be forever grateful for her love, help and example throughout my life.

The Big Guy Lowe and I actually seemed to get the hang of being parents.

We went on many long walks through the neighborhoods as that seemed to soothe our colicky baby. We blessed our little son when he was two months old and had many family members there for the special day.

My wonderful mother was able to come back out to help us for almost a month as I had to go back to work to finish some projects I was working on. That was another hard move, but it only lasted three months. Next, The Big Guy Lowe graduated.